I sit in a canvas room with daggers pointed at my throat. They're all out to get me, all out to snuff me. I feel so much hate inside that it hurts to laugh. Happiness gives me headaches. I feel the tremors in my fist and I can't stand to see them watching, conniving, waiting for the perfect moment to pounce, but I'll be ready. I'll be ready to counter and watch it blow up in there faces. The world outside is a blur of chaos and death and they don't even care. All they want is their shiny gold star for the day and, quite frankly, it disgusts me. I feel it creeping up in me, the silent quakes of fury. I sit back with fists curled and blood boiling and with a counterfeiter's smile I face them and tell them they're right. All the hiding places in the world to are taken by those who were too afraid to be the first to stand so I'll go on and fight the bullshit that's all around me. I'll fend off the wolves another day while the sheep run to safety. I'll take the lashings for those who earned them in my name. I know I'm not the man they think I am but that's ok because in due time all will see who it is I was meant to be. Then it'll just be me and the beast inside. I see him there in the dark where no one else looks. He's locked away in my heart, an eye wreathed in flames. It whispers sweet nothing in my ear telling me their secrets. It tells me their flaws and soft spots. HE allows me to see beyond into the fragility of there little house of cards as I grab the world by it's roots and shake the foundation. But, the more I see the monster, the more I feed it, the bigger it gets and the harder it is to control. I find myself having to stop Him from doing mischief in my absence. I can't say how much longer it'll be but all I know is I can't hold on much longer. The world is slipping away little by little and I don't know how much longer I can save it, if at all...